After attending church, most consistent in awhile, and being part of a bible study group for the first time, I have realized even more meaning behind Jesus dying on the cross. Yes, I knew he died for our sins, but it never really HIT me that he died for ALL of our sins, past, present, and future. How in the world did he know what sin I was going to commit at age 24? Or how does he know what sin I am going to commit at age 66? It's still unknown to me. Why would he take over EVERYONE's sins even those who killed? I don't know, but imagining and putting myself in the overwhelming shoes he filled leaves me speechless. Jesus was/is amazing.
We have been asked at church numerous times to invite a "plethora" of people to NorthRock this Easter to find Jesus and hear his message. Along with the invitation, we have been asked to share our story of how we found God. To be honest, I haven't really ever told anyone. I remember last semester at school we had a prayer group. The girl who led it asked us one day when did we find Christ. I skipped my return. I honestly was unsure at the time. My faith was present but it wasn't as strong then as it is now. So I'd like to now share my story with you. Publically. Super public even :) I mean shoot it's on the internet for all to read, but I hope that by me sharing my story you feel encouraged to attend church this Sunday (whether it be our church or another) and find Jesus.
How I found God
I was baptised when I was a baby. I attended Sunday school as a child. I went to what my sister and I called, "big people" church when I got to be around 13. ( Going into the sanctuary and hearing the sermon vs attending a sermon with our peers). We stopped going for awhile and would attend Christmas and Easter services. Then I got married and we tried to attend a church on post, but it wasn't clicking for us so we didn't attend church. During our time in Korea, my mom became very ill ( as I talk about often). My faith with God was like a roller coaster then. I believed but there were times I wasn't sure if I did because my mom was so sick. I remember when she tried a study drug and it was looking like it was working. Her tumor wasn't growing anymore! Praise God! Then all of a sudden another tumor in her brain appeared. I was in denial. I didn't want to believe it. I dreaded having to come home to see my mom in a state where she didn't know my name. Devin encouraged me to go home to see her before she died and I'm glad I did. because I don't regret one thing. I do wish I would have come home sooner, but I think on her last good day she knew who we all were. I had a really hard night one of the nights I was home before she died. I had to leave the nursing home and I sobbed and sobbed. I couldn't understand why God was doing this to me. My mother in law explained to me that he is still here. He is helping me through this. After my mom passed away, we got stationed in Washington state and attended a church there. We loved it. I cried at a sermon for the first time. Ironically, it was about forgiveness. The pastor said you need to forgive those who you have had a difficult time with. I immediately thought of some of my family members who I had been upset with and God. I cried and cried in the seat at church at that day. I realized God was speaking to me and knew I needed to move on and forgive because there was no point in harboring any anger. Unfortunately, with moving back to San Antonio and then Devin going to Florida for school we fell off the church wagon again. Recently, though we have reconnected with God and my faith is stronger than ever. God reminded me of that Wednesday night at the One Voice service our church held. After an hour of singing worship songs, our small group leader took us to the side, along with members of our small group, and prayed for me. Only me. I was taken aback. He prayed that I no longer be scared and afraid and that I remember why I am going to nursing school. It shocked me so because this week in clinical was a harder week for me. How did Gregg know that? How did he know I was scared and questioning if nursing was truly what God was calling me to do? God told him. I didn't even tell Devin that. I didn't tell anyone then out of nowhere God told Gregg without me knowing. The next day I texted my best friend Jessica asking her if I was choosing the right profession. I knew she would be honest with me and she said, "You can do this. You will love it. It is the most awarding profession and this is what you are meant to do." God told Jessica too. He didn't want me to quit because I am suppose to heal and touch people's lives as a nurse. I am speechless this weekend as to how amazing God and Jesus are. They have done so much for us on Earth and continue to do so.
If you want to hear about Jesus and sing amazing songs and learn about his love please join us this Sunday at North Rock. We will be there at 9am to serve ( me at the doors to greet, and Devin fixing a surprise with the events teams) and then will attend the 12pm service.
Hope to see you there!
