I laid in bed last night saying my prayers, thanking God for the life he has given Devin and I and thanking him for watching over us each day, I thought about all kinds of things I wanted to write in my blog. Needless to say, I can't remember exactly what I wanted to talk about except for my math class. Maybe it will come to me as I write today...
My math class is literally draining me. I feel like I am doing too much. I think it's because it's online so I have to do more work than if I was in person seeing the concepts and what not. I'm just glad I have an A and am almost done with this class. Granted I have two math classes to take next semester but oh well. It will all be worth it in the end. :)
I can't wait to apply for nursing school, get into nursing school and then officially be a Registered Nurse.
After my mom passed, a lot of people asked me if nursing was still what I wanted to do. I guess because dealing with mom was intense and I would run into other patients dealing with cancer or families dealing with death and that would trigger my memory, but I can't see myself doing anything else.
I enjoy helping people feel better and cope with hard times. They just want someone to talk to and treat them as if nothing is wrong. They wanted to be a normal person, those with a disease that is.
Honestly, I have been nervous about dealing with elderly people or people who have lost all ability to function. Before my mom had gone to the nursing home, she had lost the ability to feed herself, shower, and dress herself. Seeing someone else like that who also can't communicate is going to be tough. I thought at one point maybe I should do something else in the medical field, but I keep remembering that my mom would want me to continue with becoming nurse and she wouldn't want me to not do so because I was fearful.
I know she would be proud of me carrying on and keeping her in my heart. I also figured I could share my story along the way. And by me experiencing death in different ways, I will be able to help people of all ages.
My mom didn't think on the negative side. Even though she would complain about things, after she ranted, she took a breath and realized, " hey maybe this person is this way because they are going through a bad time in their life, or this situation is happening because this and that and the other".Sorry I can't be more descriptive, but the jist is she still found the positivity in the situation.
I believe I was put here on this Earth to help others. I married a man who is a very caring and generous person. He often puts others before himself. It drives me crazy sometimes, but in the end I am so glad we helped whoever it may be. I believe my mom taught me to not judge others and try to remember how others feel.
God gave me Devin to remind me of how I need remain the caring and generous person I am and my mom taught me to be.
You know how it often seems that the generous nice guy always gets the crappy end of the stick, but then one day it's finally the nice guy's day and he is "paid back" for all the acts of kindness he did. The key is that the nice guy , even though at times he may feel defeated, he always gets back up helps someone else and doesn't really pay attention to when and how he gets paid back.
As long as Devin and I have been together, Devin and I have always helped people, no matter how small or big the task. Devin and I would feel like we lost in the end because of the outcome. We would help someone and then when we would ask them for a favor they would say no. We felt defeated, but we always ended up helping them out again along with helping others. I think by the continuous help, we just forgot about everything else and didn't pay attention to if we got anything in return.
I'm sorry if I completely confused you while reading this. I pretty much just started ranting and thought hey, all you nice guys out there reading this. Here's to you! Don't forget your good deed(s) is/are not forgotten.
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